Post by rst9
Dad meets daughter he never knew existed 40 years later
Well, Tony Chee Mar met you for the first time in 1949 when you were 11. The CCP dictatorship had just taken control of Beijing and you were shipped out of Hong Kong to escape the CCP dictatorship.
Tony Chee Mar had never met you. In fact, he didn't even know you existed. But a noble soul as he was, he signed a declaration to the efect that you were his son so that you got a chance to live in the land of the =free and the home of the brave.
Yale Guen Mar, you owe Tony Chee Mar everything. Recall that you met Tony Chee Mar for the first time as a 11 year old "Fresh of the Boat" in San Francisco - you had just arrived from Hong Kong in 1949 after the communists took over the country you were born in. Out of the kindness of his heart, Tony Chee Mar (a US citizen) declared that you were his son so that you could be in USA.
Recall what he told you when you arrived in San Francisco. Tony Chee Mar told you, "Yale, you are a turkey".
Tony Chee Mar then added, "This is Thanksgiving. We are going to have turkey."
Wonder-struck, you had said, "Dad, what is Thanksgiving, what is turkey?"
Tony Chee Mar did punish you often, but that was only because he had to and not because it gave him any pleasure. Yale Guen Mar, you were always a pain in the ass. But Tony Chee Mar hoped his (and Kim Hi Wong's) punishments will help you become a better person.
Unfortunately, that was not to be. You were simply incorrigible. You just couldn't stay out of mischief. This, together with the obsession you had developed as a child in rural China for finger-fucking pigs in their assholes, made it inevitable that you would never be more than the miserable self you are right now.
Your mommy, Kim Hi Wong, and your dad, Tony Chee Mar, were good parents and noble souls. Your accomplished siblings Donald Yale Mar, Ellen Heath and Eugene Yale Mar have never failed to acknowledge the contribution of their parents Kim Hi Wong and Tony Chee Mar to their own successes.
Yale Guen Mar, don't be an ingrate. Your plight is your own doing. Tony Chee Mar always did his best to bring you up the right way. It is the height of ingratitude to badmouth Tony Chee Mar for your own failings.
The only thing Kim Hi Wong and Tony Chee Mar were ignorant of was that they were fighting a losing cause in trying to get an incorrigible rascal like you to grow up into decent human being like their other children Donald, Ellen and Eugene. But one can drag a mule to the well, but it cannot be made to drink from the well unless it wants to.
Donald, Ellen and Eugene grew up to be accomplished, honest upright citizens
So did Homer, Gini, Lawrence, Homer and Clarence.
You are the only black sheep in the family.
There was nothing wrong in the way Kim Hi Wong and Tony Chee Mar brought up their kids. It wasn't their fault that they had a kid like you.
Tony Chee Mar brought you up in his home in 914 10th Street in Phoenix, AZ. He let you work in his cafe. He taught you English and mathematics. He taught you the difference between a rational number and an irrational number.
If you failed to get an education, it was your fault, not theirs. Your siblings didn't fail them. Donald, Ellen and Eugene are as honest and upright as they are accomplished.
Yale Guen Mar, you shouldn't grudge the fact that Tony Chee Mar cut off your pigtail the moment you landed in San Francisco on the Thanksgiving day of 1949.
Nor should you grudge Tony Chee Mar for refusing to shave a straight line along your head.
Tony Chee Mar was a thoughtful father. He didn't want you to be ridiculed and heckled by your school mates in the new country.
That is why he chopped off your pigtail as soon as you got off the boat in San Francisco. And that is why he shaved off all your hair so that you could grow a normal crew cut and meld with your classmates.