Discussion:
I don't think Jesus would ever go to church
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Wise TibetanMonkey, Most Humble Philosopher
2017-05-14 06:41:28 UTC
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I don't think Jesus would ever go to church because he would be overwhelmed and confused over so many denominations and sects.

He would have said "Life was simple on the road." And he decided to ride a bicycle.


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Wise TibetanMonkey, Most Humble Philosopher
2017-05-14 18:02:32 UTC
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bananas are the devil's fruit designed to lead you ashtray...
not only are they deliberately phallic but they cause constipation
and calmness...
calmness removes your drives and make you incapable of useful
work or procreation
give in up before you are completely lost to grace and lust
God must have created the banana and the monkey. To me it means he has a sense of humor.
Jesus Christ is a WHITE RACE monopoly Power
2017-05-14 23:08:29 UTC
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why worship yourself ?
Wise TibetanMonkey, Most Humble Philosopher
2017-05-15 05:50:22 UTC
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Post by Jesus Christ is a WHITE RACE monopoly Power
why worship yourself ?
Everybody worships himself! Jesus came to have everybody worship him.
Wise TibetanMonkey, Most Humble Philosopher
2017-05-15 11:36:53 UTC
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On Sun, 14 May 2017 10:52:31 -0700 (PDT), "Wise TibetanMonkey, Most
Post by Wise TibetanMonkey, Most Humble Philosopher
God must have created the banana and the monkey. To me it means he has a sense of humor.
seems a very reasonable hypothesis to me
Maybe he put the monkey and the banana in my brain to deliver a powerful message to the world. I heard a voice that told me.
On a very basic level, Jesus would not approve of UK church service 'brainwashing' where people repeat the same words in a robotic manner every week, while keeping themselves in their own 'regulars clique', and dismiss those who haven't a clue what is going on, or haven't a clue whether they should be standing up/sitting down/turning around to say some robotic words to people behind them.
Jesus would be completely blanked by regular congregations if he walked into a UK church service anonymously wearing a scruffy t-shirt and jeans.
Only if he turned up surrounded by a cavalcade of bishops and cardinals, would the grey-haired parishioners get the message, and then they would just mob him begging forgiveness for themselves.
As bad as it is in the UK, Jesus would be even more traumatized in America where his followers worship guns, drive SUVs and vote Republican.
Wise TibetanMonkey, Most Humble Philosopher
2017-05-15 11:49:48 UTC
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Post by Wise TibetanMonkey, Most Humble Philosopher
On Sun, 14 May 2017 10:52:31 -0700 (PDT), "Wise TibetanMonkey, Most
Post by Wise TibetanMonkey, Most Humble Philosopher
God must have created the banana and the monkey. To me it means he has a sense of humor.
seems a very reasonable hypothesis to me
Maybe he put the monkey and the banana in my brain to deliver a powerful message to the world. I heard a voice that told me.
On a very basic level, Jesus would not approve of UK church service 'brainwashing' where people repeat the same words in a robotic manner every week, while keeping themselves in their own 'regulars clique', and dismiss those who haven't a clue what is going on, or haven't a clue whether they should be standing up/sitting down/turning around to say some robotic words to people behind them.
Jesus would be completely blanked by regular congregations if he walked into a UK church service anonymously wearing a scruffy t-shirt and jeans.
Only if he turned up surrounded by a cavalcade of bishops and cardinals, would the grey-haired parishioners get the message, and then they would just mob him begging forgiveness for themselves.
As bad as it is in the UK, Jesus would be even more traumatized in America where his followers worship guns, drive SUVs and vote Republican.
Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I came not to send
peace, but a sword.
I think he'd have more fun with a gun :-)
Oh he should have come with the sword the first time around. He should have defeated all his enemies and prevent his own crucifixion. He would have saved the world a lot of pain and suffering.

Next time he's said to come behind a mushroom cloud though.
Eternal
2017-05-15 17:52:48 UTC
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He is busy saving the lives of those who believe and have faith in him.
Post by Wise TibetanMonkey, Most Humble Philosopher
On 14 May 2017 10:50 PM ,"Wise TibetanMonkey, Most Humble Philosopher"
On Sun, 14 May 2017 10:52:31 -0700 (PDT), "Wise TibetanMonkey, Most
Post by Wise TibetanMonkey, Most Humble Philosopher
God must have created the banana and the monkey. To me it means he
has a sense of humor.
seems a very reasonable hypothesis to me
Maybe he put the monkey and the banana in my brain to deliver a
powerful message to the world. I heard a voice that told me.
On a very basic level, Jesus would not approve of UK church service
'brainwashing' where people repeat the same words in a robotic manner
every week, while keeping themselves in their own 'regulars clique',
and dismiss those who haven't a clue what is going on, or haven't a
clue whether they should be standing up/sitting down/turning around to
say some robotic words to people behind them.
Jesus would be completely blanked by regular congregations if he walked
into a UK church service anonymously wearing a scruffy t-shirt and
jeans.
Only if he turned up surrounded by a cavalcade of bishops and
cardinals, would the grey-haired parishioners get the message, and then
they would just mob him begging forgiveness for themselves.
As bad as it is in the UK, Jesus would be even more traumatized in
America where his followers worship guns, drive SUVs and vote
Republican.
Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I came not to send
peace, but a sword.
I think he'd have more fun with a gun :-)
Oh he should have come with the sword the first time around. He should have
defeated all his enemies and prevent his own crucifixion. He would have
saved the world a lot of pain and suffering.

Next time he's said to come behind a mushroom cloud though.

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Wise TibetanMonkey, Most Humble Philosopher
2017-05-16 01:25:26 UTC
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Post by Eternal
He is busy saving the lives of those who believe and have faith in him.
I don't know. I think his followers are dying as much as his unfollowers.
Deng Qi Feng
2017-05-17 17:15:22 UTC
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Tru$t and obey pay me tithe$ for I am Je$u$

Tithe$ taxe$ same $hit
Wise TibetanMonkey, Most Humble Philosopher
2017-05-18 01:25:44 UTC
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Post by Deng Qi Feng
Tru$t and obey pay me tithe$ for I am Je$u$
Tithe$ taxe$ same $hit
It was found that 12 chicken followed Jesus everywhere and they paid with eggs.
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