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https://groups.google.com/forum/#!topic/soc.culture.china/V2PN1U21XZA
Don't you remember your mother and father?
Good riddence. I didn't even go to my mother's funeral.
Other members of the family never even visit the gravesite.
Stop saying ill of others. Homer Yale Mar regularly visits the graves of Ben Shee Mar and Susan Suey Oy Wong regularly. He always tidies up their graves in Duncanville, TX, offers fruit, flowers and paper money to his ancestors.
https://groups.google.com/forum/#!topic/soc.culture.china/EpcCD47oZGE
I hadn't seen or talked to my uncle or his family since I came into the U.S.
He died in 1985 of throat cancer. My family didn't even learn of his death
until 1990, 5 years later after his death.
His wife (my aunt) died in the mid-2000. I didn't know about her death
until a year later. The last time I saw her was in the early 1949 in rural China.
Yale Guen Mar, you are making a virtue of necessity. You were told very specifically by the Mars that you are not welcome to Kim Hi Wong's funeral. That is why you had to keep away from her funeral. The story got repeated at Toy Chee Mar's funeral as well.
In fact you were barred from attending the funerals of Ben Shee Mar and Susan Suey Oy Wong as well. Homer Yale Mar very specifically told you that you were not welcome.
Don't you
remember your father and mother-in-laws?
No. the minute I stopped seeing them, that is the last thought I have for them.
Not quite. You still dream about your room at your parents' house on 914 10th Street in Phoenix. Your parents were most generous. They let you have the room long after you turned 21. You still resent that your brothers Eugene Yale Mar and Donald Yale Mar finally put an end to your mooching. You resent that they cleared the room of your gun collection, photos of your favorite pigs and your short wave radio. You came back to find that they were all gone.
I still remember the good times that I have with my mother in Las
Vegas. I still remember the love that my mother had shown me when I'm
sick, my wife, and children. In fact, we still visit my mother's grave
and bring flowers. Don't you remember your mother and father?
No, no one in my family want to remember them.
Out of sight, out of mind.
Yale Guen Mar, you have been trying to convince one and all that your obnoxious behavior is because of the way your parents brought you up.
Wrong, very wrong. Bad parents are rare. Bad sons are dime a dozen. You are a bad son and an ingrate to boot.
You don't even care for your siblings. You have openly expressed your hostility toward Donald and Eugene just because they got rid of your pig photos, your gun collection and your short wave radio. Don't forget, Donald and Eugene are the achievers that you are not.
What did your mother do to you when you were 11 or 12 years old?
NOT when I was 11, more like from the time I was born to age 11.
Yale Guen Mar, I fault Tony Chee Mar and Kim Hi Wong, not for beating you, but for not beating you enough. They should have beat the crap out of you every time you misbehaved, lied and cheated.
I bet
you must really hate her.
I didn't hate her. She had controlled of me when I was in China.
In the U.S. she didn't have controlled. I thrived in the U.S. while I was a failure in China because of her.
To put it in perspective, Yale Guen Mar is a persona non grata among his relatives.
No one in the Mar clan wanted Yale Guen Mar to attend the funerals of Yale Guen Mar's Uncle (his father's twin brother) some 30 years ago. The pattern was repeated at the funeral of Yale Guen Mar's aunt about half-a-dozen years ago. No one in the Mar clan could stand the thought of Yale Guen Mar being at the funeral. So, cousin Yue Chung Mar very plainly told Yale Guen Mar that he was not welcome.
Yale Guen Ma was a bad son right from his birth !!
A bad mother is a rarity. A bad son a far more common occurrence. Yale Guen Mar of courseis never tired of demonizing his mother in an attempt to shift blame. But it is obvious that it is Yale Guen Mar who was always at fault.
Your heart is filled with vengeance toward
your parents. What did they do to you when you were that young?
I didn't hate them. I supported them when the cafe failed.
Yale Guen Mar never supported his parents.. It was the parents who indulged Yale Guen Mar when they allowed him to retain his room in their house long after he was no longer a minor.
Yale Guen Mar lost his room only when his 3 siblings put an end to the indulgence. They got rid of everything that Yale Guen Mar had stored in t hat room, including his collection of his semen-stained photos of his favorite pigs.
No one in the family (including the 3 siblings) wants to remember Yale Guen Mar, and understandably so. Yale Guen Mar was specifically told by family members that he was not welcome at the funeral of his own parents, let alone at the funerals of cousin Yue Chung Mar's parents.
Yale Guen Mar is hated by everyone in the Mar clan.
https://groups.google.com/forum/#!topic/soc.culture.china/ee6C3jdVajw
I am very much interested in hearing from Chinese-Americans within the
United States on how their aged parents/grandparents were faring in
their sunset years. It was ironic for me growing up in a small town,
living in California most of my adult life about a thousand miles from
"home". As each of us gets older and educated, we leave "home" only to
come "home" for visit once or twice a year. My sibblings live in
Tucson about 125 miles away leaving my parents alone at "home". To me,
"home" was, is and will always be 914 10th St. and I never take any of
my things from "home" to California.
Then my father got sick and checked into the hospital. My brother in
Tucson returned "home" and talked to the doctor, who said my father may
be in hospital for about a week. Since my mother can not speak English
and alone at home, he decided to transfer my father to Tucson Medical
Center where he works and move my mother to a retirement home in
Tucson. The house was sold. "Home" is no more. All my college year
photos were gone, my short-wave radio, my gun collection, everything in
my bedroom, including the photos of my favorite pigs, were thrown away
or given away without telling me.
My father recovered and moved into the retirement home with my mother,
each taken up a room with a cost of $1,200/month each for a total of
$2,400. With no outside activities and eat and sleep, my father died
in 15 months later. My mother died two years later after my father. I
believe my mother died of loneliness and neglect. I have 3 sibblings
living in Tucson, not one would visit and talk to my mother often
enough to care.
Yale Guen Mar, can't you ever get over the loss of your gun collection, photos of your favorite pigs and your short-wave radio? Donald and Eugene were only trying to protect you from yourself.
Yale Guen Mar, you are being grossly unfair to your brothers Eugene Yale Mar and Donald Yale Mar. They were achievers. The only reason they got rid of your gun collection, short-wave radio and the photos of your favorite pigs was to save you from yourself.
Quit holding grudges against Donald and Eugene, Get their help to cope with your problems.
Funeral rites for an elderly person follow the prescribed form and convey relevant respect: rites befitting the person's status, age etc. are performed even if this means the family of the deceased must go into debt to pay for them.
Ben Shee Mar and Susan Suye Oy Wong were fortunate to be honored at their burial by their children and grandchildren. They lie buried side by side in Duncanville, Texas.
Nephew Yale Guen Mar was not welcome at the funerals by the Mar clan, and for understandable reasons.
But then Yale Guen Mar wasn't welcome at the funerals of his parents Tony Chee Mar and Kim Hi Wong either. No one wanted him at the funerals.
At Qingming Festival every year, Homer Yale Mar and his siblings pay respect to their parents Ben Shee Mar and Susan Suey Oy Wong, and all relatives and ancestors who have passed away. They spend time tidying up the graves and tombstones of Ben Shee Mar and Susan Suey Oy Wong. They offer food, flowers and paper money to their ancestors.
In stark contrast, Yale Guen Mar spends time sulking about times when he got thrashed by his father Tony Chee Mar and mother Kim Hi Wong for misbehavior.
Tony Chee Mar and Ben Shee Mar were twins.
Tony Chee Mar married Kim Hi Wong. They had lasting regrets about son Yale Guen Mar who gave them only grief.
Tony Chee Mar (1915-1999) was born in 1915, to Hall T. Mar(Chan) and Choi Kang Ma.
Tony married Kim Hi Wong. They had 5 children: Eugene Yale Mar, Yale Guen Mar, Donald Yale Mar and 2 other children.
Tony passed away in 1999, at age 84 in Arizona.
Yale Guen Mar was not allowed at the funeral because no one wanted him there.
https://groups.google.com/forum/#!topic/soc.culture.china/Cl4-o1wzUPk
All my relatives/ancestry before my generation were losers.
So don't ever talk about them to me. I have nothing but
contempt for them. And it includes all the cousins I have.
Yale Guen Mar, you used to lie to your parents, uncle and aunt. And now you lie on the newsgroup. Yale Guen Mar, you are all sleaze with not an iota of any redeeming feature.
Yale Guen Mar was a bad son from day one. He was not welcome at the funerals of his uncle and aunt abd even at the funerals of his own parents.
To put Yale Guen Mar's villainy in perspective, no one in the Mar clan wanted Yale Guen Mar to attend the funerals of Yale Guen Mar's Uncle (his father's twin brother) some 30 years ago. The pattern was repeated at the funeral of Yale Guen Mar's aunt about half-a-dozen years ago. No one in the Mar clan could stand the thought of Yale Guen Mar being at the funeral. So, cousin Yue Chung Mar very plainly told Yale Guen Mar that he was not welcome.
Yale Guen Ma was a bad son right from his birth !!
A bad mother is a rarity. A bad son a far more common occurrence. Yale Guen Mar is of course trying to shift the blame on his mother. But it is obvious that it is Yale Guen Mar who was always at fault.
Yale Guen Mar never supported his parents financially or otherwise.. It was the parents who indulged Yale Guen Mar when they allowed him to retain his room in their house long after he was no longer a minor.
Yale Guen Mar lost his room only when his 3 siblings put an end to the indulgence. They got rid of everything that Yale Guen Mar had stored in t hat room, including his collection of his semen-stained photos of his favorite pigs.
No one in the Mar family (including the 3 siblings) wants to remember Yale Guen Mar, and understandably so. Yale Guen Mar was specifically told by family members that he was not welcome at the funeral of his own parents, let alone at the funerals of cousin Yue Chung Mar's parents.
Yale Guen Mar is hated by everyone in the Mar clan and rightly so.
Yale Guen Mar's uncle (father's twin brother) was a very generous uncle. He had wanted to send Yale Guen Mar to Kansas State University in Manhattan. Yale Guen Mar was, then, working as a janitor in Junction City Cafe.
Yale Guen Mar's stint as a janitor at Junction City Cafe in Kansas came to an end when the uncle found out what the lad had been up to. Yale Guen Mar was beaten to pulp, fired from the job and sent back to Arizona.
No wonder that Yale Guen Mar has a dishonorable discharge from the US Army as a private while his illustrous cousin retired as a colonel in the US Army.
Yale Guen Mar's cousin Homer Yale Mar still remembers Yale Guen Mar's shenanigans that summer in Kansas.
Yale Guen Mar was a janitor at the Junction City Cafe that summer but he would often play hooky to visit a local pig sty to indulge himself.
Yale Guen Mar's uncle (father's twin brother) Ben Shee Mar and aunt Cynthia were exasperated not to find Yale Guen Mar when needed. One day Ben Shee Mar found Yale Guen Mar at the pig sty. The piggery's manager told Yale Guen Mar's uncle that the boy had been spending hours at the pig sty intently watching the pigs defecating and urinating. He has been told that when Yale Guen Mar thought that no one was watching, he would finger-fuck the pigs in their assholes.
Yale Guen Mar's uncle was simply appalled. He wanted to put a stop to his nephews perverted ways.
That day the uncle beat Yale Guen Mar to pulp.
The beating made no difference. So the uncle finally fired Yale Guen Mar from his job at the Junction City Cafe and sent him back to Arizona.
Yale Guen Mar went on to finger-fuck many more pigs in their assholes.
But it was a big jolt for Yale Guen Mar last year when at the age of 75, he found his middle fingers so badly infected with STDs that his doctor in Merced has been advising him to have them amputated.
The STDs have begun to seep from Yale Guen Mar's middle fingers to his brain. And that explains Yale Guen Mar's maniacally obsessive and erratic behavior.
Yale Guen Mar should have his middle fingers immediately amputated. Or else, he should rush to his doctor in Cambodia to see if the middle fingers can be saved by alternate medical treatment.
Yale Guen Mar, you are not only a loser, but a rank ingrate as well.
Yale Guen Mar, you could have been like your cousin Homer Yale Mar who went on to retire as a colonel in the US Army.
You on th eother had got a dishonorable discharge as a private in the US Army. The only reason you didn't get demoted was because you were already at the lowest rung of the military as a private.
To put it in perspective, Yale Guen Mar is a persona non grata among his relatives.
No one in the Mar clan wanted Yale Guen Mar to attend the funerals of Yale Guen Mar's Uncle (his father's twin brother) Ben Shee Mar some 30 years ago. The pattern was repeated at the funeral of Yale Guen Mar's aunt Susan Suey Oy Wong about half-a-dozen years ago. No one in the Mar clan could stand the thought of Yale Guen Mar being at the funeral. So, cousin Yue Chung Mar very plainly told Yale Guen Mar that he was not welcome.
Yale Guen Ma was a bad son right from his birth !!
A bad mother is a rarity. A bad son a far more common occurrence. Yale Guen Mar of courseis never tired of demonizing his mother in an attempt to shift blame. But it is obvious that it is Yale Guen Mar who was always at fault.
Yale Guen Mar never supported his parents.. It was the parents who indulged Yale Guen Mar when they allowed him to retain his room in their house long after he was no longer a minor.
Yale Guen Mar lost his room only when his 3 siblings put an end to the indulgence. They got rid of everything that Yale Guen Mar had stored in t hat room, including his collection of his semen-stained photos of his favorite pigs.
No one in the family (including the 3 siblings) wants to remember Yale Guen Mar, and understandably so. Yale Guen Mar was specifically told by family members that he was not welcome at the funeral of his own parents, let alone at the funerals of cousin Yue Chung Mar's parents.
Yale Guen Mar is hated by everyone in the Mar clan.